Friday, December 4, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation: Guess Jeans

When I was reading my old journals this week...I came across my New Year's Resolutions for January 1988.

1. Lose 20 pounds
2. Get a Job
3. Decide what to do with my life
4. Try to control my temper
5. Write in Journal more
6. Stop watching The Young and The Restless
7. Cut back sugar
8. Drink more water
9. Buy a pair of Guess Jeans

I didn't even remember that I wanted those jeans! So that's my ULTIMATE GOAL. To buy and wear Guess Jeans. I like these:



 

What's your motivation this week?

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Why Are You Fat?

During this season of The Biggest Loser, I've noticed more than ever before that they are talking about why.

WHY ARE YOU FAT?

It's always been a question on my mind and I've always wanted to really get to the root of the problem.  I know that there are things in my childhood that I can contribute to my quest to fed my emotions.  I'm surrounded by people that like to make up fake excuses for everything and I don't want to do that.  I want to know why I do this and figure out how to get past it.  On my Young and Relentless blog, I post my teenagehood diary entires every month and in the back of one of these journals I recorded my measurements and weight for about a year.

I noticed that I started out at a healthy weight....and then over a few months after I turned 17, I gained 30 pounds.  Luckily, I have these journals and an almost daily record of what was going on in my life to try to figure out what happened.

 After spending a great deal of time reading....I had two conclusions.  A Boy and All-You-Can-Eat Spaghetti were the problems.  I had started dating a boy who was very controlling and who I wasn't sure I wanted to be with.  I kept going back to him and let him take my power away (among other things) ....and he changed me. Around the same time, my Dad was hurt in an accident and I started having migraines.  I also frequented a local italian place on Monday nights and I remember having eating contests with my girlfriends.  And then there were the hidden boxes of Butter Cookies in my room. Oh my!

I started thinking about all of my failed relationships and their impact on my weight.  When I'm single....I'm thinner and I take care of myself.  When I'm in a relationship....I put on weight and deal with my emotions with food.  Do I exchange food for the love I want?

It was like a huge lightbulb went off in my head! I can't believe it took me 22 years to figure this all out.  When I'm with a man...he comes first and I neglect myself.  And now that I have a family...everyone comes before me.  When I think about doing something for myself....I feel guilty.

It's high time that Connie learned to take care of herself!  This foolishness has gone on long enough!

Have you figured out why you're fat?  What can you do to change it?

Monday, November 30, 2009

Pregnancy: My Best Diet Secret!

I'm getting really excited about the new diet plan I'm going to be starting soon.  I'm about to explain why I'm so excited and show you some pictures.  I'm going to tell you about my pregnancy with Alex. 

I've been heavy for a long time.  I started putting on weight around my 17th Birthday (more about that another day) and with each broken marriage....it just got worse.  When I left my second husband...I weighed 245 pounds.  My heaviest!

I left him and my old life, moved to Denver and joined 24 Hour Fitness.  In a few short months, I lost 25 pounds and fell in love with being active! Over two years time....I got down to 184 pounds.  My lightest in 12 years.

Then I started dating again.  When I met my current (and last) husband...I was down to 198 pounds, after getting back up to 206. I had just started running and watching what I ate when he came into my life.  I managed to keep my weight down until I suffered a miscarriage and fed my grief with food. 

When I got pregnant with Alex...I weighed 220 pounds.


I got pregnant in July 2005 and I didn't really have morning sickness...I just didn't feel like eating.  I didn't want sweets at all and I really didn't want soda.  I craved French Dip Sandwiches and Fries.  Wendy's Fries. 

In the first 8 weeks, I lost 8 pounds.  And I began to notice that my face was thinning out.


September 2005


December 2005


February 2006

 
April 20, 2006

3 weeks after I gave birth, I weighed 202 pounds! I jokingly told my husband that being pregnant was the best diet I've ever been on!  Not only did I come out of it weighing 18 pounds less than when I started but I felt great the whole time.


It's possible that's why I found myself pregnant again a few weeks later.  I'm a weight loss junkie! 3 weeks after having Mallory....I weighed 202.  And I looked pretty good.



The weight has crept back on over the last 2.5 years.  My recent high was 218 at the beginning of the year.  Losing weight is really difficult for me and I always having trouble with my knees because there is too much weight on them. 

A few weeks ago, Bobbi came home and said the doctor she works for is going to start offering this new diet program called The hCG Diet.  My ears perked up because that is the diet I've had the most sucess with! LOL!

I asked her to talk to him about letting me be a patient and blogging about my success.  He agreed!  So...in a few weeks when they are ready to get started.....I will be going on the hCG Diet.

A little info:

The hCG weight loss protocol consists of a very low calorie diet (VLCD) accompanied by treatments of hCG, rather oral or injected.  The average hCG dieter experiences rapid weight loss averaging 1 to 3 pounds per day.  In addition to loss of unwanted fat, the true benefit of the hCG protocol is its ability to help modify the dieter's relationship with food and eating, resulting in easily maintained, long-term weight loss.

hCG stands for Human Chorionic Gonadotropin, a hormone present in both men and women, but which is produced in great amounts in pregnant females.  During pregnancy, the substance almost completely controls the woman's metabolic functions.  In non-pregnant persons, research suggests hCG similarly increases the metabolism similar to a pregnant female.  Thousands of calories in stored fat are released, and are used by the body or expelled.

Info from hcgdietinfo.com

Friday, November 27, 2009

Surviving Thanksgiving

I'm not doing a friday fashion post today.  I think I have a food hangover! The good news is that I am STILL the same weight as when I arrived.  YAY! 

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!  I have to tell you....I'm disenchanted with the holidays this year.  As a person that is trying to lose weight and lead a more healthy life....it seems like holidays are just reasons to eat.  A lot!

I ate small portions, eating more turkey and cranberries than anything and then had two very small pieces of pie (one pumpkin, one pecan) that really was too much sugar for me to handle.  I should have just had a couple bites of each...I know I would have been satisfied.

We went around the table and talked about what we're Thankful for.  My son is thankful for trains and my daughter; pink bicycles.  My hubby said that he was with his family.

I was last to speak and I knew exactly what I was going to say and I knew that no one else at the table would have the same answer as I.

I'm thankful that we are all *somewhat* healthy.  They laughed about my *somewhat* but it's true.  Everyone has some issue.  Hubby is diabetic, as are my BIL and MIL.  We are ALL overweight and my in laws are on numerous pills.  I'm so thankful that my skin cancer was not serious!

I told them that my WISH for 2010 is that everyone (including my aging in-laws) becomes more active!  My wish is for my husband and I to join Golds Gym and figure out a schedule where we consistently go to the gym.  I told him I wanted us to watch less TV and exercise more.

I watched The Biggest Loser: Where are they now the other night and based on that show and my many seasons of the show...I've come to a conclusion.  An Oprah A-HA moment!

You have to exercise to lose and maintain weight loss!

It's ground breaking right?  There's no way around it and I've always said that one of my goals is for my kids to be active and NOT learn to be couch potatoes from me.  The only way to meet this goal is for me AND MY HUBBY to get our asses moving. I think I almost have him convinced.

I'm also getting excited for something that's coming up soon that I can't wait to share with you.  Something that has a great chance of jump starting my weight loss!  Stay Tuned!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

I'm on Vacation

I'm on vacation in Denver this week.  It's really hard for me to watch what I'm eating while I'm here because this is one of my favorite cities and there is so much great food here.

I've been weighting myself every morning on the scale that my in-laws have in their guest bathroom and it hasn't changed.  So I feel pretty good that I'm doing okay.   What worries me...is that it's all going to catch up with me when I get home....like Jet Leg.

And friends...I've been eating very well.  I went out for a fabulous brunch with my brother in law on Sunday and my hubby and I snuck off for some Christmas shopping and Sushi yesterday.  Can't wait for Thanksgiving!

Which brings me to what I'm Thankful for this year.  I'm thankful that even though I am overweight...I'm healthy.  I'm thankful that my skin cancer wasn't the bad kind and that I will have a little scar to remind me to use my sunscreen.  And I'm thankful for my healthy family...and I hope changes I'm making will make them healthier.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation: Tight Sweater

I got an email from New York and Company with this sweater on the front. I love it. But I know I can't wear it right now. It's too short and I"m sure too tight....it would show every. single. roll.




I'd get this beautiful sweater in red.....Antique-Button Ruffle Cardigan from New York and Company

Thursday, November 19, 2009

$10 a pound

My husband just took my kids to get the oil changed in my SUV because we are leaving for a week long vacation to Denver tomorrow.  I have a dozen things left on my to-do list that I should be doing but I'm here instead.

I gained three pounds this week.

I know exactly how it happened.  Saturday happened to me.  I was like one of those before video's from The Biggest Loser.  It all started at Wendy's with a Double Stack and fries.  My husband also got a Rootbeer float and a ice cream dessert thing.  We shared the ice cream drinks but....I didn't need them.

And then I had a Girls Night Out with The Real Housewives of Utah and I ate badly.  Pasta with prime rib chunks and a cheese sauce and then half of a Creme Brulee.  In my defense, I didn't finish my dessert but it was mainly because I had eaten so much I was afraid I was going to throw up.  And I might have....if I hadn't just paid my $30 bill.

That's $10 a pound.

$30 that could have went through the gym membership that my husband said NO to.

I don't know if I can afford not to join.  My life may soon depend on it......

In other news, I just heard that Oprah's pulling the plug on her show. I want to go to her show soooo badly!  It's a dream of mine.  I'm sure the chances of getting tickets to her show and my husband taking me to Chicago just hit the slim to none category.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation: Work It Out

I almost forgot it was Friday!  This week has been a little hard....due to my 3 year old hitting the defiant stage.  If I hear the word NO one more time....

Anyway, I don't know how he knows but every time I start working on my fitness...he starts having sleeping problems.  Every time I need to get up early...he wakes up in the night and I don't get my sleep.  I'm so frustrated!

For this week's fashion motivation....I was thinking about the adorable work out clothes that I've always wanted.  But I want to look cute in them...you know.



I love this little number from JC Penney.  I love the color and since I have long legs, the crop pants will always be the right lenght!   If you like it you can find it HERE.

What's motivating you this week?


10 Reasons Exercise makes you Skinny!

 I've made a decision to exercise (and shower) in the mornings before my husband leaves for work.  It's gonna be a tight schedule but I can do it.  I felt so good after I did it this morning.  And this article got me motivated.

This information is from  Fitness Magazine's website.  10 reasons why Exercise will make me SKINNY!


1. Exercise zaps belly fat.
It's the easiest way to beat the bulge, period. "Regular moderate- to high-intensity aerobic exercise has the greatest impact on reducing ab fat -- the dangerous fat that ups your risk of diabetes and heart disease,"  Exercise is the ultimate middle manager because it lowers levels of cortisol, a hormone that has been linked to ab fat.

2. Exercise controls calories.
"It's pretty simple: You need to burn more calories than you consume in order to lose weight," says Nancy Snyderman, MD, a FITNESS advisory board member, editor-in-chief of BeWell.com, and chief medical editor for NBC news. Regular exercise blasts excess calories that would otherwise be stored as fat. "Plus, you continue to burn calories even in the hours following your workout,"

3. Exercise keeps lost pounds MIA.
"Ninety percent of people who have successfully lost weight and kept it off for a year do about an hour of physical activity a day,"

4. Exercise boosts metabolism.
Yes, you'll lose fat when you diet without exercising, but you'll also lose muscle, which means you'll burn fewer calories. The more muscle you have, the higher your metabolism and the more calories you'll torch.

5. Exercise trims inches.
The number on the scale doesn't tell the whole truth, says FITNESS advisory board member Jari Love, a certified personal trainer and fitness DVD star: "When you shed fat and gain muscle you may lose inches and drop sizes without losing actual pounds." For instance, if you gain 3 pounds of lean muscle and lose 4 pounds of fat, you've actually experienced a 7-pound improvement in your body condition, despite the scale only showing 1 pound of weight loss.

6. Exercise curbs emotional eating.
"Working out has been proven time and time again to help regulate mood, which has a direct effect on people who eat when they're stressed or upset," says Robert E. Thayer, PhD, a professor of psychology at California State University, Long Beach. Translation: When you're already in your happy place you don't need Ben & Jerry to lead the way.

7. Exercise creates a healthy chain reaction.
There's a reason you find juice bars at the gym: "Healthy habits tend to cluster together," says Boston-based psychologist Eric Endlich, PhD. "When people make positive changes, like getting more exercise, they tend to work on other health improvements as well, such as eating better." The result? Weight loss.

8. Exercise brings on the fun.
Let's face it: Rock-climbing is way more exciting than eating a celery stick. That's why it's easier to be active to stay slim than to maintain a strict diet. "If you look at people who incorporate exercise successfully in their lives, they've found something they truly enjoy,"

9. Exercise stops hunger.
People who exercise and diet are actually less hungry than those who only diet, according to a study in the journal Obesity. Bonus: Your self-restraint is higher, too.

10. Exercise ups energy.
Regular physical activity increases stamina by boosting the body's production of energy-promoting neurotransmitters, studies show. That pep gives you even more motivation to get moving and shed pounds. When was the last time diet alone did all that?

So, the bottom line is....I just have to DO IT!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Baby Steps

It's Wednesday! Time to weigh in....


Last week: 205 pounds
This week: 204.5 pounds
LOST: .5 pounds

WOOT!  I don't know what I did to deserve this because I didn't start my exercise program like I wanted to.  I'm struggling and I'm not sure why.  I know I'm tired and the change in weather tends to bring this on for me but I the weather has been *nice* here...it hasn't been cold yet and it's been sunny.


I sometimes feel like I need a therapist to help me figure out what my problem is.  Why can't I stay motivated to exercise?  Is it too late to change my ways?  Is it because I wasn't raised being active?  Why can't I eat better?  Why do I slide back into these old habits? 


I keep thinking about the gym membership that I wanted.  I want to be active.  I want to lose weight.  I want to be strong and a good example for my kids.  I want them to be happy, healthy and more active than I was growing up. 


The only way any of this is going to happen....is if I FORCE myself to do it.  What is it going to take?


I watch The Biggest Loser every week and I want what they have.  But I don't want to eat excessively healthy all the time.  I want Kit Kat's and cake, cookies, soda and wine.  I know that I can't have both. 

What is it going to take?

In an effort to get myself back on track...I'm taking baby steps.  Since Monday....I've been taking a shower and putting on REAL clothes and make-up as soon as I wake up in the morning.  Three days in a row so far.  This is helping me feel so much better during the day and I think I have more energy since I'm dressed!!

Next week....going to bed earlier....so that I can start getting up earlier to work out.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation: Boots

For this week's Friday Fashion Motivation.....I'm going to talk about something that I've wanted for a very long time.  I think this fashion item looks amazing with so many different outfits and would make me look taller, thinner and like a rockin Momma!


Look how awesome these tall black boots from Nine West are! They are a little pricey...but I think they would last for a long time.

Here is my only problem. Most boots don't accommodate my LARGE calves.  This is my motivation this week.....What is your's? 

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

I Survived Halloween!

All morning....I've know I was forgetting something.  It just occurred to me that I weighed in this morning.  LOL!

Last week: 206 pounds
This week: 205 pounds
LOST: 1 pound

WOOT!   I'm amazed...because of the CANDY situation.  But I was sick over the weekend and didn't eat much.  I get my stitches out again today and then I'm planning to get back on the working out wagon.

You want to know what really motivated me?  Seeing TRACEY all skinny last night on The Biggest Loser.  WOW...what a transformation.  If she can do it....then so can I, right?

I didn't end up joining the gym.  I really wanted to...but I just couldn't find the money in my budget right now.  Maybe in the spring I can revisit that idea.  It did give me a lot to think about and I was remembering the first time I joined a gym and what a positive experience it was for me.  I'm hoping to blog about it later this week.

Until then....have a great week and come back FRIDAY to see what my motivation for the weekend will be.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation: Halloween Edition

Lynn had the great idea to make this week about Halloween costumes so I thought long and hard about what costume I would like to wear if I had the body I want and I came up with this.



This costume comes in only three sizes...Extra Small, Small and Medium. So just to fit into the medium we are looking at a waist size of 27-30 inches and a bust size of 36-38 inches. This would definitely take some work for me to get into.

What is your fantasy costume?

Have a great weekend!


Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Just Say No...to the Pop Tarts

It's Wednesday...that means it's time for me to weigh in!

Last week: 205 pounds
This week: 206 pounds
GAIN: 1 pound

And this is the part where I tell you my excuses. I had my skin cancer surgery last week and it went well. My face still kind of hurts...not sure if that's normal....I go in this morning to have the stitches removed so I'll ask. The first day...I had a hard time eating. And then I wanted to eat everything. TOM showed up a week early and my daughter had a fever all weekend. I did a lot of stress eating.

And I bought a box of Strawberry Frosted Pop Tarts. Have you had these? I grew up eating them and they are like CRACK to me. I pass them in the store all the time, telling myself that I can't have them. If I buy a box...I somehow find myself eating them all in a matter of hours days.  Of course, I was hiding them from my family...behind the Vodka.  But yesterday I broke down after my kids refused to eat breakfast and I gave them each one.

You should have seen it.  My daughter....so smart and inquisitive, asked me what this delicious pasty was called and wanted to know what the white stuff was.  I told her all about the sugary goodness and she said 'mmmmm....I really like this'.  Well, of course you do....it's baby crack!  I fed my babies CRACK!

This week, I got an email from the gal I took the ZUMBA class from.  She is closing up shop. I told Big Pappa about it over dinner and he reminded me that he didn't think I could do it.  I corrected him and informed him that the only reason I didn't go again was because of the cost.  It was $8 per class and if I went once a week, that was almost $40 a month.  I told him I'd rather join a gym for that kind of money. He tried to tell me that gym memberships are much more than that and I disagreed. SHOCKING!   I told him it couldn't be more than $40 because I used to belong to a gym and I'm sure I paid around $30 a month.  To prove him wrong...I called Golds Gym and inquired about a membership.

That is when I found out they are having a heck of a sale right now and I could join for just $35 a month.  This place has a pool, an indoor track, daycare and classes.  I got a little bit excited thinking maybe I could join.  And then...Big Pappa said no.

He has good reasons.  When would I go? Daycare is only free for family memberships ($65) so I would have to go in the evening.  It's 7pm by the time everyone arrives home, eats and I clean up the kitchen.  7pm is when I generally crash into a heap on the couch with a glass of wine or a Skinny Cow.  And I already have a home gym...in my basement.  I have an elliptical machine and a weight machine.  So maybe he's right..

I guess it was pretty telling when the membership guy I talked to asked if I wanted to come down right then and there (7:30pm) to check it out and have a free workout and I told him I couldn't because I was watching The Biggest Loser.  But do you know what happens when someone tells me that I can't do something?  It makes me what it more and it makes me what to eat ice cream.....

So last week ended up being a lazy week.  I didn't even think about exercising.  The chances of me going for runs in the cold, dark air...have blown away like the leaves on the trees.  Plus, my little community has turned into a hot bed of crime.  Our local PD is on twitter and they report all of the crime...it's made me feel a little unsafe since many of these robberies are happening between 5-7am.  SCARY!

This week....my goal is to GET UP and use my elliptical machine 3 times. (Thursday, Monday, Wednesday) And to NOT buy anymore Pop Tarts.

Please join me for Friday Fashion Motivation! The theme is Halloween costume!  WOOT!

EDITED: I just returned from the Dr. and I can't believe this...but they didn't get it all and she had to recut my incision, remove MORE tissue and re-stitch it.  I have 5 more stitches now.  I'm so irritated because I have to go back in a week and my husband is out of town next week.   I really wanted to put this all behind me....

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Friday Fashion Motivation

I love fashion!  I had the best (and most frustrating) time putting together outfits for the SITScation blogging conference last week.  I didn't have any money in my budget for new clothes so I shopped my closet and I did really well.  But I'm looking forward to the day that I have to buy ALL NEW CLOTHES!  The Gym Bag Dropout gave me a great idea!  Every week she is going to post a picture, story or cartoon meant to keep her motivated.  This week she posted two cute outfits that she would like to fit into.

Looking at clothes...online.  Always motivates me.  So I thought it would be a great idea to do a fashion post every Friday...to keep me motivated through the weekend.  And i want you to join me.  I'll put up a MR. LINKY every Friday for your post.

My motivation this week is a Leopard Print Knit Dress from New York & Company.

 



Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Starting Over

I see that it's been a few weeks since my last confession.  The last time I posted...my life was stressed out and we didn't know what was going to happen to my husband's job.  I have good news!  He survived the layoff (this time) and we are feeling much more relaxed now.

Just after that was our trip to Denver, then last weekend I went to VEGAS for the SITScation Blogging Conference and today I will have my skin cancer surgery to removed the basel cell carcinoma.

Somewhere in all of that...I lost THREE POUNDS!  I think I have a secret...are you ready for this?  Cheerios.  In an effort to reduce my kids sugar intake, I bought them Cheerios and I started eating them myself.  Okay...I have another secret.  Crackerfuls.  They are a new snack cracker that I love and I've been eating them for lunch.

I have not been exercising.  Once the cold weather hit...I couldn't bring myself to run outside.  I'm a wuss. Plus, my kid is having sleep issues again.  I'm hoping to find time to use my home gym.

So I sit here at 9 pounds lost.  I really want to hit that 10 pound mark so maybe...I will try to exercise this week!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Week 28...15 Days

This blog post contains spoilers to The Biggest Loser Season 8.

Welcome to the 28 th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 208 pounds
This week: Weigh In Cancelled!



This Yesterday morning I woke up at 5:30am with a killer migraine. It was so bad that I couldn't even drag myself down the stairs to the kitchen to get some pain reliever so I scavenged through my bathroom cabinets and came up with a lone ALEVE. I put myself back to bed hoping for 45 minutes of sleep and expecting to feel much better when the pain meds kicked in.

I woke up...feeling a little better only to discover that my husband's alarm had NOT gone off and it was now 7:15am and Hubby had an 8 o'clock meeting. There was a mad scramble to get him out the door and make myself some coffee.

And I forgot to hit the scale.

It's probably for the best because I've been under a lot of stress and my weight goes up no matter what I do.  On Monday...I will know if my hubby still has a job and then I can either relax...or deal with a whole lot more stress.  I'll let you know what happens.

No matter what happens...I'm going to Vegas in 15 days.  I'm attending the SITScation Blogging Conference and I'm super excited and nervous!  I'll be meeting 80 (I'm guessing) other bloggers and honing my blogging craft.  I really do love to blog and meet new people so this is perfect for me.

The dealio is...there is a shirt that has been hanging in my closet for 5 months that I really want to wear.  It's a lovely lavender color with poofy cap sleeves and I love it.  But it doesn't quite fit.  Do you think I can fit into it in 15 days?  We shall see!

My works outs haven't been happening.  I went for my run on Sunday morning and it felt great!  And then the weather changed and I haven't been out since.  I'm going to try to go tonight after hubby gets home.  I have GOT TO keep up with my exercise.  No Excuses.

Did you watch the Biggest Loser last Tuesday night?  I loved the message...it's all about your choices!  And I'm going to try to use the would you rather phrase in my own life....I just need to remember to do it.  Liz made me laugh when she said...she didn't get fat by pushing herself and she was awesome in that challenge of carrying those 25 pound buckets!

Tracey....oh Tracey.  It appears she is the bat shit crazy one in the group this time.  Are they casting this part now for the show?  I couldn't believe that after she forfeited her trainers for the week that she would take the other challenge too and then manage to piss off almost every single person on the ranch.  She is tooo much! I still don't understand how that gal lost 11 pounds! BANANAS!

I want to talk about the yogurt that Bob gave Abby to snack on.  The 100 calorie, 5 g protein, has extra calcium and vitamin D.  It sounds WONDERFUL...but I wanted to know how many sugar grams it had.  I've been tracking mine pretty closely and I'm shocked at how much some food has in it.  I looked it up during the show and it has 11 g of sugar.  That seems like a lot to me since you really should only have 40g in a day.  I know it's an easy snack but WOW..that's almost 4 teaspoons of sugar.  What do you think?

My final thoughts on the show.  I love that Amanda wears FULL make-up and diamond earrings to the last chance workout!  Love her!  And I was very sad to see Sean and Antoine leave...but they are doing GREAT at home.

Have a great week!

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Week 27: Fighting PMS

This blog post contains spoilers to The Biggest Loser Season 8.

Welcome to the 27 th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 208 pounds
This week: 208 pounds

LOST....0 pounds

TOM is here. But did you notice? No weight gain! A couple months ago, I started taking Evening Primrose Oil along with my vitamin D supplement. I was having such horrible hormone crashes, migraines and food cravings. And it would take me a full week to recover from it. This is unacceptable!

This month...I didn't even realize that TOM was about to arrive and thought I might be pregnant! He quietly showed up without the fanfare of a day ruining headache and I didn't have to hide in the pantry with a bar of baking chocolate.  The real bonus here?  I haven't wanted to kill my husband...yet.

Evening Primrose Oil is rich in gamma-linolenic acid (GLA), which is useful in treating a number of conditions including endometriosis, autoimmune disorders, benign prostatic hypertrophy, eczema, diabetes, and migraines. It helps relieve symptoms such as irritability, bloating, breast soreness, and depression occur before and during menstruation in many women. Clinical studies show that the GLA found in evening primrose oil contains essential fatty acids that seem to alleviate symptoms.

I am taking 3-500 mg pills for the first 2 weeks of my cycle and then 6 pills (3 in the AM and 3 in the PM) for the last half. It's working out great!

Fitness: I ran TWICE last week. YAY!  And I was supposed to run yesterday...but my daughter came down with a fever and I was up all night with her.  So..tomorrow I will be onto Week 1 DAY 3 of Couch to 5K which works out great because then I will be on track with my friend Jessica (who really needs to update her blog...just sayin') who is doing the program too.

This week...Amber wants to talk about The Biggest Loser and how it's inspiring me. Hubby and I have watched this show together for a couple seasons now and I believe that we learn so much from it.  There is always some tidbit of information that we might not have thought of before.  Like what an AHA moment I had last night when Jillian was showing the Brown Team to make a week (or a few days) worth of snacks and line them up in the fridge!  It really only takes 10-15 of prep time to make sure you can grab and go what you need.  I love this idea because I used to rely on those protein bars as a quick on the go snack.  NO MORE!  Next time you go to the store...look at the labels on those.  HIGH FAT and SUGAR!  You might as well eat a candy bar.

This week on The Biggest Loser....I was all kinds of pissed off at Julio.  It didn't look like he was working very hard but then he came through with a 19 pound weight loss and blew everyone out of the water.  He confided that he was working out on his own....and then I understood.  I do the same thing.  This is why I don't join gyms and I run around an unlit track in the pitch blackness of 5am!  Crazy right?

I was so glad to see Tracey back but I'm irritated that they won't tell us what is wrong with her.  She can't work out with everyone else?  WHY! I think she did great even though she was only walking and swimming. Jillian must be right...Calories In...Calories Out!

I loved the conversation between Bob and Jillian about killing Julio and when they were playing tug of war with that big guy (still struggling to learn all of their names) and I cried when Sean found out he was having a baby girl!  I wish they would have Curtis Stone on every week because that man....oh lord was I happy to see him!

The best part of this episode was that everyone (except Julio) worked as a TEAM and lost 155 pounds that week!  No one went home!  I'm really liking Bob and Jullian working as a TEAM also but I know that can't last....

 Coming Next week...progress photo! 

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Week 26...Biggest Loser is Back!

This blog post contains spoilers to The Biggest Loser Season 8. The name of the contestant that went home has been written in WHITE to conceal their identify.

Welcome to the 26 th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 208 pounds
This week: 208 pounds

LOST....0 pounds

Did I tell you about the candy? Oh right...I did. F-ing candy. If I never see another Twix bar it will be too soon. And my husband's birthday is three days after mine so there was cake. Now there aren't any birthday's until March. Thank goodness!

Last Wednesday...I started the Couch to 5K program...and I had to restart it today because I didn't get a chance to run since then.  Okay...that's not true, I had a chance I just chose not to.  And I had to run last night when my sister's dog got out.  That is all about to change because my biggest motivation of all time just started last night!

It's on like Donkey Kong!

I love The Biggest Loser.  Watching that show every week keeps me motivated and I sometimes I learn something.  I love Jillian...she's my favorite!  But I would crap my pants if she were my trainer.  So...in addition to updating my progress each week, I'm also going to talk about the show.

My  favorite contestants....Tracey, Amanda, Rebecca, Abby and Liz.

I like Tracey because she's a homemaker and we have to stick together...plus, she has drive.  Unfortunately, she drove herself into the ground and spent the first week in the hospital.  I'm concerned because they never told us what was wrong with her.  Thanks to her teammate Couch MO...she got to stay.

I like Amanda because I voted for her to be on the show last season.  I think she has a good attitude but I wish she had been able to lose more this week.

I like Rebecca because she is cute and I liked her hair.

Abby....broke my heart.  I want to her to succeed sooo much.  She has an amazing attitude and spirit.  I love her already.

Liz...is the older lady of the group and I thought she looked MUCH older than 49.  I don't want to look like her when I'm 49 (in 10 years).  She is a wake up call to me.

In the end Alexandria went home and lost 60 pounds.  She talked about meeting someone at the ranch and being excited to get to know him.  Who could it be? She's only 20 so it's got to be either Antoine or Daniel. *The contestants name has been printed in WHITE so that those that haven't seen the show yet will not know who went home.


I announced my race schedule last week! Did you see it?  I'm being a little ambitious but I like to have goals.

P.S. My hubby left for work late this morning because he has a doctor's appointment to check his blood sugar levels.  (he was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes in January 2008)  So I had a chance to talk to him and I talked him into doing a Biggest Loser Weight Loss Challenge with me!   YAY!

P.P.S.  Please go over to my friend Tricia's blog and support her quest to lose weight!  She working really hard on WW and needs some bloggy friends!

Monday, September 14, 2009

BOTR: My Races

I got so busy with celebrating my 39th birthday and my new early bedtime because I suddenly can't keep my eyes open past 9:45pm that I forgot to post about my races.  I feel really badly that I blew off the race I was going to do for my 39th birthday.  I just restarted my training so I decided my punishment...would be to run more races and to challenge myself when I can.

Just the fact that I'm doing the training and races in THE FALL/WINTER is a huge challenge for me.  I tend to hibernate and work on my winter fat to stay warm in Utah but this winter is going to be different!

Connie's Race Schedule:


October 11th ~ Run walk The Rocks 5k in Morrison Colorado


October 31st ~ Harvest Run 5K Wellsville Utah


November 26th ~ Anthem Turkey Day 5K Broomfield, Colorado

Speaking of my birthday...you will NOT believe what my family (husband and sister) got for me.  Me, the woman that has been busting her ass running on the track and cutting her sugar grams....


CANDY! 


Can you believe that?  Granted...it was my FAVORITE candy but I don't need it.  And I should have threw it all in the trash...but I didn't. 

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Week 25...I love Sugar

Welcome to the 25 th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 209 pounds
This week: 208 pounds

LOST....1 pounds


I'm slightly disappointed with that ONE pound but I'll take it. I can tell you right now why that is only ONE pound and it's my own fault. I ate Pizza last night. I forgot to take anything out for dinner and my husband told me to order a pizza. It's like the single worst thing I can eat. I pay for it for days!

The good news is that I've been exercising again. YAY! Altering my kids' nap schedule has been working and they have been sleep through the night! I'm also leaving for my run a little bit later so that it's not quite so dark. It was funny last week though...Friday morning, I left the house at 5:55am. It's a little under 1/2 miles to the track and I ran part of it so that I would get there quickly...then I started walking around the track (which is not lit) and came across one gal. As the sun came up and I could see my surroundings...I saw that there were 6 people there and we were all spaced out and never ran into each other. It was a little strange and felt like I was in a scary movie.

I'm working really hard to keep my sugar to 30g a day and my sodium to 2400mg. The sodium hasn't been that hard...but the sugar is killing me! I'm going to keep working at it because once I get my sugar under control...I'm going to work on my kids next! Which brings me to Amber's question of the week:

How are you being a healthy role model for your children?


I don't think I am yet. At the moment...I am working out before they get up for the day so they aren't seeing me exercise. I'm working on making better choices and eating small portions which my daughter already does but my son has a big appetite for a 3 year old. We have not been good about not giving them candy and ice cream. In fact, I think my son is craving sugar because he gets up in the middle of the night looking for stuff he isn't allowed to have all the time. Last night he was after a jar of tootsie rolls! Thank goodness for the Toddler Alarm we installed (my sister in the room under the kitchen). She put him back to bed for me. This sister-wife thing is working out GREAT!

Right now...I am working towards getting into shape so that I can be active with the kids so that they grow up with a childhood full of activity and fun. I don't want to raise sedentary people. I don't want them to end up like me....

I want to be off from a DIET before my daughter knows what's going on. I never want her to be on DIET. I just want my kids to be healthy and active...and happy!

Plan for week 26:

Wednesday: Couch 2 5K day one
Thursday: Lift Weights
Friday: Couch 2 5K day two
Saturday: Off
Sunday: Yoga
Monday: Couch 2 5K day three
Tuesday: Off


I almost forgot! I am issuing a challenge to help you get a jump start on the holiday eating! My friend Kara and I have formed a group called Bloggers on the Run! The challenge is to walk or run a 5k (or more) before December 1st. This is your chance to take personal responsibility for your health at a time when some of us fall into the couch and start eating all of their kids' halloween candy. Join the group by going to THIS POST leaving a comment, grab the button and start training. I'm going to do several races in Utah and Colorado and I'll be announcing them on FRIDAY! Do it for yourself, for your family and mostly do it for your country! We're all counting on you.....

Have a great day and don't forget to wear sunscreen, eat your vegetables, spay & neuter your pets and wash your hands.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Bloggers On The Run


Do you remember that one time that I wanted to run a 5K for my birthday? Yeah...well...Life happened and my training dropped off and I had to restart my quest for fitness. The other day when I was awake with my son in the middle of the night for the hundredth time, I found myself praying to God to help me with my motivational and sleep problems.

Soon...it came to me that I should adjust the children's nap time (from 1pm to 2pm) in the hopes that they would be more tired and actually take a nap and sleep better at night. After three days of this plan....I have been getting more sleep and have restarted my exercising plan! YAY!

And then my friend Kara told me that she wanted to get a group of bloggers together to train for a race (or series of races) with the hopes that we would all motivate each other and have a little friendly competition. I love friendly competition so I jumped at her offer!

All you have to do to participate is pick a 5k (or any length) in your area and dedicate yourself to walking or running it! We've made a cute little button so you can show off your walking/running pride, too! Once you finish your race, we want to hear about it! Go ahead and comment in any of my (or Kara's) blog posts when you finish it (be sure to tell us the name of the race, and what city you ran it in!) and we'll post it in our sidebars! We're hoping to get lots of people to participate, so tell your friends! Also, if you want...post about your progress while training so we can all support each other.

Oh, if you do more than one race, be sure to let us know that too! You get double the sidebar postage! I'm hoping to do a bunch of races in Utah and Denver! I'm super excited!

If you want to participate, just grab the button off my side bar, and comment to let me know so we can add you to the sidebar! I'll put your name up as a participant in "Bloggers on the Run!"

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Week 24...Dark

Welcome to the 24 th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 210 pounds
This week: 209 pounds

LOST....1 pounds


Okay....only lost ONE of those TOM pounds. I'm having some issues and I think they are sodium related. I'm working on eating more REAL food instead of processed and will see if that helps. I'm also trying to keep my sugar grams low. I posted on Monday that I was trying to stay until 15g. This is humanly impossible for me. I'm not going to shoot for 30g and work my way down. For example, I ate cereal this morning and I'm already up to 17g. I have to stop eating cereal. Let me tell you how helpful my Lose It iPhone application is for this....tells me exactly what is in my food. LOVE IT!

I'm having a really hard time with my exercise. It is too dark at 5:30am and I freak out easily and think there are scary people in vans down by the river waiting to kid nap me and take me to the Abbot cabin so they can turn me in to Victor Newman for a cool million. Wait...that's on Y&R...see how my imagination runs away with me?

I HAVE an elliptical machine in my basement but I don't feel like I get as good of a workout on it as I do walk/lumbering down the street. My husband suggested that I walk with the kids during the day...but they walk at a snails pace and stop to look at every bug, rock and leaf. At night, by the time I finish serving and cleaning up from dinner...I'm exhausted.

So...here is the NEW PLAN for Week 25:
Thursday: Walk at 6am @ track by my house.
Friday: Walk at 6am
Saturday: Off
Sunday: HIKE a trail by my house
Monday: Walk at 6am
Tuesday: Walk at 6am

Sugar grams under 30g
Sodium under 2400mg
More Water..less Dr Pepper
NO FAST FOOD

I liked walking at 5:30am because there is NO ONE out at that time. I worry about being hit by a car or something kidnapped so my new solution is to DRIVE to the track and walk my butt off.

Question of the Week: What are your successes this week?

Hmmm...I did walk ONE TIME. And when my husband brought me ice cream...I only had a small amount. Sorry, that's I've I've got!

Have a great week!

Monday, August 31, 2009

Deep Thoughts:

I got an email from Oprah this morning. Although I'm often irritated with her lately (her shows aren't as good as they used to be and she made Mom's that blog look stupid) I still like to get her daily emails because there is some good info in there.

Today's email was about Motivation. We all know that I'm in desperate need of motivation and I'm struggling to get back on my track. At this point I can't even SEE the track. But I'm looking for it.

I talked last week about a couple things that I have to look forward to that should be motivating me to get my butt moving. Oprah just gave me a couple more things.

Exercising wards off Alzheimers.
This is an important one for me because if I lose my cognitive skills my husband is in really big trouble. This poor man as the memory of an gnat and I am constant having to remind him or things and find his stuff.
Exercising boosts your energy.
Again, I need more of THAT! I have Irish Twins (2 kids born in the same year) that are 2 and 3 and they run me ragged! I'm often so tired that I just let them do what they want because I'm too tired to stop them.
Exercising slows aging.
Not only do I feel old right now...I look older too. 10 years ago people were mistaking me for a 20 year old. Now I completely look my age and it's started to trouble me. And my recent skin cancer diagnose doesn't help. I want to look younger! Also learned a tip from The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Vaseline. On your face. No wrinkles!
Exercising helps manage menopause!
This is one of the reasons that I started all of this working out business. I know it's coming. THE CHANGE! I'm already getting the hot flashes and hormone swings. Once my metabolism shuts down...I'm screwed! I have to get this all under control before the big M hits.....
Exercising reduces the need for drug treatment.
This is a pet peeve of mine. I hate how doctors always want to throw DRUGS at a problem. My husband is a hypochondriac and at one time he was one 3 different drugs for things that I didn't really think were a problem he couldn't solve with some exercise and healthy food choices. And guess what? I was right. He is no longer on them...plus, they made him feel like shit! When I have an issue...I always try an herb remedy first.
*********

I'm challenging myself to stay under 15g of sugar today! I'm got my handy Lose It iPhone App out and planning my meals for the day. I hope I can do it!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Week 23...Stuck

Welcome to the 22nd (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 208 pounds
This week: 210 pounds

GAIN....2 pounds


I didn't get my post written yesterday but I have a great excuse. Wanna hear it? I'm a Mom who blogs (as opposed to a Mommy Blogger) at The Young and The Relentless and yesterday I was the featured blogger at SITS. It was a great day! I had tons of visits and comments on my blog and made a bunch of new friends.

You will notice that I've gained two pounds since last week. I would like you to know that on Friday of last week...I weighed 206. But guess who showed up for my blogging party yesterday? TOM.

The last few months I've done a little experiment with some supplements and as soon as TOM leaves...I'll tell you about them. I think I've had a break thru on the PMS front.

I am having a horrible time getting back on track. I've too tired to get up early (because my son wakes up during the night...he's 3) and my kids are refusing to take a nap so I'm getting no workouts in. And when I'm tired...I eat.

One morning this week I was laying awake in bed at 4am (thanks Alex) and I was thinking about all of the things that are coming up that I wanted to lose weight for. The first one being the 5K that is not just 16 days away that I'm going to blow off.

And I have a fabulous blogging conference that I'm going to in October. I want to look all cute and stuff when I meet these bloggers for the first time. There is a shirt that I bought at the beginning of the summer that I want to wear....

Finally, I want to learn to ski! My friend Chrisy even offered to teach me and I told her I would do it *when I lost weight*. My reasoning for waiting was that I wanted to buy a CUTE OUTFIT to ski in and I didn't want to buy FAT CLOTHES.

So...here I sit. Not working out, eating Swiss Rolls (damn you Bobbi) and gaining weight. I guess I really need to have a long talk with myself and get motivated. Why can't I get my ass in gear?

SITScation........7 weeks
Learn to Ski....20 weeks



This week AMBER wants to know what my favorite dieting secret is. If I had to come up with one thing that is a key to losing weight...I would have to say FIBER. We all know what fiber does for us....and if you are full of **** you will gain weight and feel like crap. Literally. This is a secret that I need to do more of...because it makes sense that if you eat healthy, natural food (made by God a farmer) that you will process it faster and feel better.

Plan for WEEK 24:
Thursday~ ELLIPTICAL
Friday~ Walk AM
Saturday~ Off
Sunday~ Off
Monday~ Walk AM
Tuesday~ Walk AM
Wednesday~ Walk AM

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Week 22...Head Cold

Welcome to the 22nd (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 208 pounds
This week: 208 pounds

Loss....0 pounds


I've been sick. I had this huge epiphany last Thursday....and then I got a horrible head cold. I'm just NOW starting to feel better....but it's been a week of comfort food and laying around.

You may notice that I changed the name of my blog. I am now Fat to FIT Mommy. You can read all about the changes in my thinking and name if you click HERE. I recently had a bunch of drama in my life involving my parents and my decision to not have them in my life (for now) brought back so many memories and feelings I needed to deal with. It was as if a light bulb went off and a lifetime of bad choices became clear to me.

I'm putting the past behind me and starting over with a clean slate. I will no longer allow toxic people to create drama in my life. I will walk away from people that aren't good for me. I will be selfish and do things that are right for me and my family.

The Plan for week 23:
Thursday ~ Walk
Friday~ Walk
Saturday~ Off
Sunday~ Yoga
Monday~ Walk
Tuesday~ Walk


Question of the Week:

Not just back to school time, but basically, summer is coming to an end. Is summer harder or easier for you to stick to your weight loss goals?

I've been thinking about summer ending because I'm not a workout in bad weather kind of girl and once the temperatures drop....I will need to move my exercise indoors. Which shouldn't be that hard since I have an Elliptical and a Weight machine in my basement. It's just a matter of committing to the change in routine. I can do it...and I will! That said, I will need to find all of the motivation that I can because I tend to want to hibernate in the cold Utah winter.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

A New Beginning

When I was a little girl and I thought about having a family of my own; I always dreamt of having a daughter. I couldn't wait to dress her up and do girly things with her. So when I finally started having children and we were blessed with Mallory....I was so happy!

Lately, I'm realizing having this girl in my life is a huge responsibility. In this day and age, Children are bombarded with images on TV, movies and magazines of unrealistic body types and things that want to steal their childhood from them.

I desperately want my daughter to be a child for as long as she possibly can. I want her to love her body and have a healthy self-esteem. In addition to that I also want her to be athletic and never have the weight problems that have plagued me my entire life.

All of this begins with ME!

I was listening to my favorite daily blog talk radio show yesterday and Fiona Bryan (aka Bantering Blonde) was guest hosting for Jen Hinton. The topic of the show was Body Image and we were talking about the Kelly Clarkson SELF magazine cover that was altered to make her appear thinner. We also talked about how we can help our kids have a positive body image and it gave me a lot to think about.

I thought about the example that I'm setting for my children and it occurred to me that I'm not doing a very good job. Ever since they were born (and for many years before) I've been struggling with my weight. I've always been trying to shed some pounds and it has always been hard for me. I grew up with poor eating habits and with someone commenting on my weight and often felt like his love was conditional. If I was heavy...he wouldn't love me as much. Those thoughts are still with me.

When I started this blog...I named it Fat Mommy to Hot Mommy and I was focused on losing weight. This has been my focus for years.....and years. And I have lost weight but it is never permanent because it isn't a lifestyle change. It is always temporary because I'm not focusing on the right things. I realized that I don't want to be a HOT Mommy...I want to be a FIT Mommy!

Because of the connections I've made through this blog and twitter, I've realized that it's more than just losing weight...I want to be healthy and fit. I want to make PERMANENT changes that will have a direct impact on my kids and what they learn from me. I want to stop feeding my feelings and I want to be active and athletic!

One person that has been the biggest inspiration to me is Chris Ross from See Chrisy Run. She has been a runner for years and she recently started training for a series of races in the Utah mountains. Last Saturday, she and her friend (she calls her Supermodel) ran the Jupiter Peak Steeplechase...straight up a mountain! I don't see myself ever doing something like (I'm not that brave) but what touched me, is how proud her boys are of her.


I want to run, bike, ski and play with my kids. I want them to be proud of me and my fitness. I want to keep up with them and to live a very long life so that I can see them become fabulous adults. All of this begins with me....

So the first thing I did was change my blog name to Fat to FIT Mommy.

I have so much to learn and work to do. It's hard to undo damage from your childhood but I'm determined to do it...so that my kids have a better life.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Week 21...Resisting Temptation

Welcome to the 21st (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 206 pounds
This week: 208 pounds

Gain.....2 pounds

I've been a very naughty girl. *connie hangs head in shame* It's been an emotional week. My skin cancer diagnosis left me reeling and in shock. But thanks to many wonderful emails and comments I discovered that the chances of it being Melanoma are slim. And if by chance it is, I'll deal with it. However, these revelations....didn't prevent me from doing some emotional eating. I knew what I was doing and I knew the consequences.

My sister has been here a week and a half and I'm struggling with her being here because of the FOOD issue. She buys lots of junk food and I've found myself eating it. She also eats like a Toddler so I've altered our menu to accommodate her and it's taking it's toll on my eating habits. I've got to find a way to balance this out.

Bobbi's stash...it was worse, we ate some of it.

I jumped back on the Wagon yesterday and I was happy to see the wagon sitting outside my house waiting for me at 5:30am this morning! I wandered the neighborhood...not sure where I wanted to walk...this darkness is freaking me out a little. I ran into my little old man and I noticed that his ball has a string attached. What a smart guy! I also saw a falling star (my husband has informed me it was a METEOR) and I had to laugh because When I Grow Up by The Pussycat Dolls was playing and this was the line when I saw it....

Be careful what you wish for Cuz you just might get it You just might get it You just might get it

Plan for Week 22

Wednesday~ Walk
Thursday~ Sadie Nardini Yoga DVD
Friday~ Walk
Saturday~ Walk
Sunday ~OFF
Monday~Walk
Tuesday~Walk
  • Vitamins
  • Water
  • NO MORE SODA!
  • Healthy Family Friendly Recipes
Want some of this? Click HERE.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Eminem made me do it.

My alarm went off at 5:15am this morning...like it does most mornings. For the last two weeks I've been shutting it off in the middle of the night because I'm not getting enough sleep. There is a little boy in my house with sinus trouble and he likes to play in the middle of the night and then he gets hungry. It's really hard to get up at 5:15am when you had to serve snacks in bed to your toddler at 1:36am.

Anyway, I have a ring tone that wakes me up that is somewhat motivating. It is what gets me out of bed most mornings. It's from the Big & Rich Song Big Time.

Today is even better than yesterday
Everything is going my way
I'm living the big time

Once I hear this...it runs through my head a few times and then I get up. Today was tough. For once, I didn't have a headache but I did have a pain in my stomach that I know well. A gallbladder attack.

I haven't had an attack in almost two years but I know why I'm getting one now. I've been eating crap and not drinking water or exercising. It's been an emotional week and I take it out on food. Plus, my sister is here and she buys all kinds of crap and it calls to me from the pantry. Thinking of getting a lock box for her to put her stuff in....

I laced up my shoes, grabbed my water bottle and I was off like a Prom dress. It's really dark in Utah at 5:30am so I've decided to walk through the Adult Living community a few blocks away. It's well lit and there is a little old man that walks there every morning. He's smarter than I, as he wears a flashing red light on his belt. He also bounces a small ball every few steps and his movements are fluid and light. I'm sure he is pushing 80 and he inspires me....

I also ran into the Mormon Barbies that I see ever so often. I wave as they trot by in their perfectly matching workout outfits, tanned limbs and sleek blonde ponytails. I'm jealous of their ability to run....

When I started out this morning,I told myself that no matter what, I was going to go 2 miles....I look at my iPhone and I'm only at 1.26 miles. My knees are sore and my right hip is starting to talk to me.

I'm at a crossroads. I can keep walking straight and go home...finishing just under 1.5 miles or I can turn left, walk up the hill and reach my goal. Before I make up my mind a new song comes on my iPod...Lose Yourself by Eminem.

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?

That was the push I needed and I took the long way home....2 miles exactly!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Week 20...Trying Not to Worry

Welcome to the 20th (completed) week of Extreme Makeover: ME Edition hosted by the incredible Amber Filkins!

Let's weigh-in...

Last Week: 209 pounds
This week: 206 pounds

Lost.....3 pounds




HOT DOG!
On Monday, I was all worried that I had thrown away the last 2 and a half months worth of work. I finally got out for a walk and it felt like I was starting over. I have lost my momentum and I'm working to get that back...but it's hard. Especially after yesterday.....

As part of my attempt to take better care of myself I made an appointment to see a Dermatologist to have all of my moles inspected. (they all checked out fine) While I was there I was going to have her look at this spot on my face that I've had for a couple years that is like a dry patch that will never go away no matter how much lotion I put on it. The worried look on her face as she examined it sent chills down my back. She told me that she would be taking a biopsy of it to *see how bad it is*.

I have skin cancer.

I left the office and called my husband from the parking lot and I broke down. How could I have waited so long to have this checked? I racked my brain to think of how long it has actually been there and it's been at least 2 years...and it's grown. I spent the day trying not to think about it but the word cancer kept creeping into my thoughts. And of course I googled skin cancer which was a bad idea. I won't know anything for three weeks (sooner if it's REALLY bad) so I'm going to try not to worry...but it's hard.

In the back on my mind I knew this day was coming. I grew up with a Mom that taught me to suntan with baby oil and we never used sunscreen when we were out on the boat. As an adult, I had what they call Tanarexia....I frequented the tanning salon several days a week and bought lotions to make me darker! I'm happy to say that I haven't done any of that in six years but the damage has been done.

Plan for Week 21:
Wednesday~ Sadie Nardini Yoga DVD
Thursday~ AM Run
Friday~AM Run
Saturday~OFF
Sunday~Hike
Monday~Sadie Nardini Yoga DVD
Tuesday~AM Run


Monday, August 3, 2009

Confession Time~Come Back Wagon

I'm upset with myself....

I haven't exercised (except for that one walk in Wisconsin) for two and a half weeks. I was on such a roll before I went on vacation. Even though I was struggling with migraines...I still went out and moved! And I took that Zumba class! Wow...I was feeling so good.

I got up this morning at my usual time and it was pitch black outside (and HOT). I don't really like walking in the pitch black that much because I worry that people can't see me. I didn't encounter any cars....but it still makes me nervous.

So the results of this morning were that I was only able to go 1.5 miles. My back and knees were hurting and I felt like I was walking through sand. I've lost my momentum. Two and a half months of work is down the drain and I feel like I'm starting over!

The 5K I was training for is only 6 weeks away....I'm not sure I have enough time now.

Also...since I'm in a confessing mood. My sister moved in with us this weekend. She left an impossible situation in Texas, packed up everything and moved to Utah. We are jokingly calling her my Sister-Wife because I seriously need some help around here with these kids! I know I'm going to love having her here...but she drinks Dr. Pepper. OH TEMPTATION! I'm trying to resist.....

*connie chases the wagon and jump back on*

Anyone else struggling lately?


The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. ~Martin Mull